I changed my major to English.
I sort of had a mini panic attack the first day of classes this semester. I was in a lab for one of my Geology classes and I just sort of freaked out because I felt like I didn't know anything and never would be able to figure it out. I don't think anyone noticed, but I'm not sure. I left class early and didn't go to any classes the rest of the week. And I seriously considered dropping out of college. I didn't really want to drop out of college, but at the same time I did.
That got me thinking. I've never really liked my Geology classes. I mean, some parts were cool, but except for a few fantastically awesome exceptions, I didn't like them. And for the last two years I've been skipping classes and playing catch up and hating school and wondering what was wrong with me that I couldn't even force myself to go to class. Finally, I figured it out a huge part of it: I don't want to study Geology. So I dropped most of my Geology classes and decided to change my major.
The only question was what to change to. After looking at all of the majors offered and after adding an English class to fulfill a general requirement and after praying a lot, I decided that maybe English was something I liked enough to study. So I changed my major.
It's scary. I'm afraid that I screwed up my life. I'm afraid I made the wrong decision, but I know that I had to make a decision. I know that I couldn't stay with Geology, but I'm not sure that English is the right choice. But, is there a right choice? I just don't know. Sigh.
But at the same time, I really like my English class. I like thinking and talking about the things we are reading in class. And while my papers haven't been super great so far, at least I've written them, and they're getting better.
So maybe, even though any job that I get because I major in English (if I ever get a job ^_^) won't be nearly as cool as a job I could get as a Geologist, I will be happy.
Also, maybe you noticed, I changed the look of my blog. I haven't decided for sure if I like it this way, so it might change again soon, but for now this is it. Enjoy ^_^
