Sometimes I lay on the floor in front of my computer and I pretend to do homework, but really I'm listening to the TV playing downstairs, wondering what show my sister is watching and if I will regret it if I go down to see.
This weekend has been good. I listened a lot. And some things became clear to me. I have to make some decisions, decisions I thought that I had already made, but I'm not sure if I decided the right thing, so I have to decide again. These decisions scare me. What if I am wrong? What if I don't choose right? What if there is no right and it doesn't matter what I decide, as long as I really decide, instead of decide by not deciding? If that makes any sense.
I'm afraid of the future. It's scary and full of possibilities and uncertain and I'm afraid I will ruin it. But since I can't stop time, I guess I will just have to face my fears and move forward.
No comments:
Post a Comment